2019. What a year. And we’ve not even seen out our first month yet. What I love is that so many people are hell bent on 2019 being a brilliant year. And I for one cannot wait to see how it pans out.
When it comes to times of uncertainty, it’s only natural to turn to things that you can control. It’s far more satisfying than wasting time lamenting things you have absolutely no influence over. So, like many, I’ve decided to look inwards for a while.
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Do you ever get that feeling when everything just feels… wrong? You can’t put your finger on it, but you know this can’t be the way things are supposed to be, so you may as well just give up right now? Why even try and make things right?
I haven’t always known this, but recently I’ve come to recognise this as my anxiety speaking. It transforms my happy go lucky outlook on life to one of resigned bleakness. I’m so happy to be able to call it by its name. To be able to look at it, almost objectively, and push it out the door. Phew! Continue reading
Moving to a new city is an adventure. As someone who loves to be enchanted by the everyday, I couldn’t be happier discovering the weird and wonderful that every place has (whether the locals recognise it or not).
The hardest part of moving to a new city, is that is left behind. The love, support and kindness that protects you everyday feels just that bit weaker when your friends and family are hundreds of miles away. Continue reading
La dolce far niente. The sweetness of doing nothing.
Lying on a beach and listening to the water, to the laughter of those around you. Watching the sun change the world around you, lighting up the landscape in pinks and purples, or bright gold. Feeling the peace of the world before it has had time to wake up.
One of my favourite feelings is the electricity in the air right before a thunderstorm. Continue reading
Indonesia has such a fascinating religious history, something I wanted to explore whist I was out there. Bali, The Island of the Gods, has been inhabited since 2000 BC. It is the only predominantly Hindu island in Indonesia, the others being primarily Muslim. Hindu symbolism is evident throughout the island, and is very much at the centre of every day life.
Canang sari is one of the daily offerings made by Balinese Hindus to thank the Sang Hyang Widhi Wasa in praise and prayer. Every home, every business, every place of worship puts of sari multiple times a day. They are little woven grass baskets, filled with flowers, petals and incense. Continue reading
I didn’t believe it would ever happen either. And I’m not sure it’ll ever happen again. You know when you’re on holiday, and you’re feeling the vibe of your new temporary home. You’re chilled. You’re content with yourself as a being. You see a beautiful, billowing, bold dress at a market stall, and you think Yes! This is who I am now. I’ll buy this dress, and I’ll wear it with pride when I get home, and everyone will see the person I’ve become. And then it sits in your cupboard for years, until you throw it out with a grimace, chiding yourself for being so naive.
This, was a little bit like that. I visited Bali over Christmas, and it was incredible. Sitting by the pool in the glorious Indonesian sun, I discovered Bintang. Grapefruit Bintang to be precise. I became a beer drinker. I even upgraded to regular Bintang, in half litre bottles. I felt like an adult. I had achieved one of my goals. I was winning.
But, as with your stylish dress, when I got back home, and tried being a beer drinker, it just didn’t fit right. It tasted awful. I felt uncomfortable. The smell, the taste. All of it awful. So I’ve gone back to my old faithful, gin & tonic. Tried, tested & loved.
Here’s to the next holiday where I can become, once again, a beer guzzler. Just like I’ve always wanted…
On my way to America I was chatting to one of my girlfriends Francesca (a vivacious, spontaneous, glamorous woman) about my bucket list, and she told me that that the only thing on her bucket list was to see Calvin Harris DJ in Las Vegas. Continue reading
In this journey I have had so many ‘Stardust moments’. If you haven’t read the book or seen the film, go away and watch/read it. Right. Now. There is a scene where the fallen star, who hasn’t been able to shine since she landed on the Earth, is in a warm bath, feeling comfort and kindness for the first time. And her shine returns, starting from her heart, seeping out of her whole body*. That’s how I feel today.
Today I was welcomed into the home of Donna and Mel, Jay’s parents, to celebrate Passover with their family. And whilst the family approached the event with a humorous cynicism reserved for those about to hear the same mildly funny jokes of the umpteenth time, I was actually looking forward to it.
Passover is a special time in the Jewish calendar as it is about remembering the struggles of the Jews as slaves of the Egyptians, and the tough time in the desert that followed. They eat bitter herbs to signify these bitter struggles (horseradish, in our case), unleavened bread to signify the poor food available in this tough time, and a variety of things dipped in salt water to signify the tears wept. I’m skirting over the details slightly, as you can look into the celebration for yourself if you’re interested, and I would absolutely encourage you to do so.
This week I said goodbye to England, and jetted off to visit my wonderful friends Heidi & Jay in Santa Cruz, California. My journey was not without it’s drama – Heidi turned up to get me from the airport, and there was no Sallie to be seen. Somehow, I had managed to get the date of my flight wrong. Fortunately, Heidi worked her magic and got me on a flight the next day.
They have taken me in for four whole weeks, and I am so happy to be able to spend this time with them. I’ve missed Heidi unbelievably much since she left the UK, but she looks so well here. The lifestyle is good for her. It brings me joy to see her find her place in the world.
Mission: Playtime 